Ultimatum
by Gothic-Romantic99
Summary: Mello never knew how much his near death experience scared and hurt Matt. Finally recovered, Mello is ready to resume his work with the Kira investigation. Matt, too afraid of what might happen next time, gives Mello a choice: him or the investigation.
1. Barely Alive

I do not own Death Note.

Author's Notes:

1) This is my first time ever writing Matt and Mello. Hopefully they are both in character, if not, please let me know. I took some liberties with Matt's character as he was only in (I believe) two episodes. I haven't read the manga, so I only have the anime and fanfictions to go off of for him. Please feel free to tell me if anything seems out of place.

2) I'm not exactly sure how much time elapsed between the night Mello blew up the building and when he resurfaced to confront Near. For the purpose of this story it's going to be about two weeks.

3) I'm not a doctor and my medical knowledge is limited, so feel free to correct me on any medical inaccuracies.

Warnings: There is some violence, a few gruesome details, the mentions of sexual activity, and the implied sexual coercion of a character in this chapter.

On with the story.

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><p>Matt watched in horror from a safe distance as the building that currently housed his lover went up in smoke. His voice vanished in his throat, the only sound that could escape being a weak croak. Every fond memory played behind his eyes along with the nagging realistic portion of his brain that relayed the slim probability of Mello's survival.<p>

He swallowed the collected saliva and mashed the sole of his shoe onto the pedal. The vehicle sped through the L.A. streets, bothering neither for speed limits nor pedestrians. The image of Mello's burning flesh replayed through his head. Matt bit his lip in an attempt to push the thoughts away. His teeth broke the skin and that aversive, iron taste filled his mouth. The redhead took a deep breath and directed the car towards the direction of the black smoke.

Upon reaching the destination Matt leapt from the car and dashed towards the nearest entrance. The flames and heavy smoke warned his rational mind how dangerous it was to enter a slowly collapsing building. The familiar sounds of sirens filled the air, revealing to Matt just how little time he had to complete his mission.

He kicked down the door that barely hung on by its melted hinges. A rush of smoke passed through the new opening, sending the redhead into a coughing fit. With the goggles in place, protecting his eyes from any possible flying dirt or metal, he stepped through the entrance that stood menacing yet inviting like a hell mouth. The temperature rose a good thirty degrees from the cool evening air that had spoiled him.

The ceiling of the first floor had already collapsed providing him with unneeded obstacles. He carefully, yet quickly stepped over the debris, keeping both eyes out for his beloved. His heart pounded with each step all while that annoying voice in his head lectured that Mello was gone and he needed to save himself from his own demise.

Mello had given him strict orders to leave him and carry on with the investigation were anything to happen. Matt agreed to Mello's insane scheme, but for now his heart negated every rational argument his mind produced. All he could see was a future without the only person who ever loved him.

The striped-clad man used his arms to protect his face from any dangers that could be awaiting him inside that hazard trap. There was the chance that several mafia members could mistake his shadow for a cop and shoot him before he even reached their field of vision. Then there was the even greater possibility that Mello was already dead. Matt placed a hand over his mouth and pushed those thoughts far away. Something inside told him that the blond was still alive somewhere in that condemned building. He would spare that hotheaded moron from Hell for tonight.

Matt carefully navigated the death trap. He nearly tripped over fallen debris, but caught his balance just in time. He took a deep breath and scanned the area for any sign of life. A lump lying beneath a pile of rubble caught his eye. Matt hurried over and gasped at the face of a man he had been introduced to two weeks prior. Matt forgot his name, but knew he was once one of Mello's underlings. Gathered from the puddle of blood surrounding the victim's head along with the painful angle his neck was bent it was apparent he had already passed.

That discovery only hurried Matt's efforts. He could only hope that the flames that resulted from the bomb had not claimed Mello leaving him victim to the flames of the next world.

It became harder to breathe as the heat suffocated the skinny man. Matt fanned himself with his sweating hand as his eyes surveyed the area closer. The first corpse gave him little hope, but an even greater reason to believe Mello was dead.

A glistening of silver caught Matt's shielded eyes. He squinted to see through the blur produced by the leaping flames. He rushed over and gasped as he recognized the large "M" carved into the barrel of that gun he had become accustomed to since his reunion with Mello. Matt's heart jumped at the sight of that familiar arm limply sticking out from behind a large collection of fallen metal. Matt hurried around the obstacle and plopped down on his knees beside his best friend.

The right side of Mello's face, neck, and arm were ablaze. Matt frantically searched around for anything that could serve him. He hurried over to the corpse of another dead mafia member that lay a few feet down and ripped the coat from his body. Matt fiercely swung at the flames. He continued this motion until the fire subsided.

Matt knelt down beside Mello, staring at the severely injured body, wondering how he should go about moving the other male. The leather-clad boy's chest lightly rose and fell, the breathing seemed labored, but for the moment it was a good sign.

The sirens were getting closer. Matt let out a swear then, grateful that Mello was still unconscious, grabbed the blond and hoisted him over his shoulder. Mello hung limply, his arms swaying as Matt dashed from the building. Flaming debris fell towards Matt, barely missing him several times. In the entirety of his life, Matt was not once praised for his lack of athletic abilities, but at the moment his body found hidden strength and he refused to stop running until they were safely away from the collapsing building.

Matt tossed Mello into the backseat of his car. He sloppily fastened the seatbelt about his friend who was lying on his side upon the leather seats. Mello emitted a painful moan and slightly shifted, but did not wake. Matt released a sigh of relief then hurried over to the driver's seat.

With the speed of a fury, Matt raced to the hospital. It was not the closest, or even the one with the best reputation. No, he needed to go to the only surgeon who Mello's life could be trusted with.

Matt arrived at the small hospital reserved for those who had exceeding amounts of wealth, or other things of great value to offer. To the rest of society it was a mere clinic, but to those in the mafia, it was the one place their secrets were safe. The doctors were amazing, but the fee was steep.

The redhead nearly broke the seatbelt while freeing his friend's body. Mello was tossed over Matt's shoulder again and he ran towards the darkened building. He banged on the locked glass doors. The person watching the monitors recognized the unconscious form belonging Mello and allowed Matt entrance. Matt panted as he approached the desk. A woman in a white nurse's gown greeted them with a scowl.

"What happened?" she asked.

"Explosion," Matt rasped. "Please, is Dr. Benson here?"

She nodded and beckoned for him to follow. The further inside the building they went, the more obvious it became of activity. They had to keep up the appearance of it being a clinic that closed at five, so only the lower levels were allowed to display electricity after hours.

The nurse unlocked a door that led to what appeared to be a normal surgical room. She assisted Matt with placing Mello on the bed. He was thankfully still out cold. The nurse injected an IV into Mello's arm then announced her leave to retrieve the doctor.

Matt stood by Mello's side. He pushed Mello's unsigned hairs from the burnt flesh. He had to bite his lip to hold back the urge to vomit at the gruesome sight. It was painful to look upon the other and Matt knew that Mello would be in a world of pain when he finally regained consciousness. He only hoped that this doctor was as good as his reputation. Morphine was expensive, but Matt was willing to go to any lengths to obtain the necessary sums.

"Must've been quite an explosion," a deep voice said causing Matt to jump. He spun around to stare into the face of the creepiest man he had ever set eyes upon.

Matt had the misfortune of meeting Dr. Benson once before, and at that time he seemed off, for he kept mentioning to Matt how he deserved so much better than Mello. Matt smiled and nodded just to be polite, but as soon as Mello emerged from the hospital room, Matt stayed by his side until they entered the safety of the outside world once more. The shadows and late hour did little to portray the surgeon in a brighter light.

Benson stepped into the dim light with that infamous grin on his face. His lips were thin and his oversized teeth occupied the majority of his smile. The beady eyes behind those thick-rimmed glasses along with the graying black hairs that framed his shaggy face gave Matt a reason to shiver. However, despite his appearance, he was the only one who had a remote chance of rescuing Mello.

"Please, Dr. Benson, do whatever you have to to save him," Matt begged, stepping closer.

Benson chuckled which caused a chill to creep down Matt's back. He reached out a hand and clamped those skeleton thin fingers over the redhead's shoulder.

"I do whatever I can for my patients," Dr. Benson replied. "I'll make him good as new."

"Thank you," Matt said short of breath. "Thank you so much."

Benson laughed and moved away. He stepped towards his patient and smiled at the boy's wounds. He washed and sterilized his hands then applied the latex gloves. He grabbed the sheers and snipped the leather vest. Some of Mello's charred skin ripped away with the leather causing Matt to wince.

"You don't have to watch," Benson said looking over his shoulder.

Matt nodded and turned away. His eyes were red and puffy from trying to keep the tears from falling. He could not cry for Mello, not while he still had a chance. Though he was not a religious person Matt whispered a quick prayer for his lover.

After a few minutes of examining the injuries Benson moved towards the redhead. Matt turned to meet the doctor's smile with a serious frown.

"Those burns are nasty," Benson said with a chuckle.

Matt glanced up at the doctor. He had to suppress the urge to punch that man for laughing at the most inappropriate time. He swallowed the anger allowing only the pain and desperation to seep into his words. "But you can save him?" he asked.

Benson placed one bony finger and thumb beneath his chin. "Yes, I suppose it is possible," he said. "That is if you're willing to pay."

Matt nodded furiously. "Yes, as much as you want, just please save him."

Benson's eyebrow lifted. "That is an interesting offer you make," he said with that creepy laugh. He placed a hand on each of Matt's shoulders causing the younger man to tremble. "But I know how hard it is to come by that much money."

Matt shook his head. "It's no problem. I will do anything I can to get it for you. I don't care how much."

Benson tilted his head to the side. "Not to mention the extra fee for keeping his business in the mafia a secret." That sinister smirk reappeared. "And what was that about kidnapping the Japanese police chief's daughter?"

"How—how do you know about that?" Matt gasped, his lower lip quivering.

"I get loads of information from my patients each day," Benson revealed. "And your expression now just confirmed it." He turned his back towards Matt. "Yes, I do think that he is a high priority on Kira's list right now."

"But you honestly don't care about that," Matt pleaded.

Benson's smirk increased. "Aiding a wanted criminal can be a crime itself," he answered. "Not to mention how much Kira would pay to learn Mello's real name."

"But you don't know," Matt argued.

"I have my sources," Benson retorted with a cackle. "You see, Matt," the way he spoke Matt's name made the mentioned gag. "Silence can be quite expensive when it's of the utmost importance."

"But you can't, I mean you wouldn't really tell anyone," Matt said on the verge of tears. "I came to you to save him. Why are you doing this?"

"I never liked that prick," Benson snapped, taking a glimpse at his patient. The vitals were weak, but constant, giving Benson the time he needed to complete his negotiation. He turned back to Matt. "But I am willing to save him and keep my mouth shut…" he trailed off giving Matt a creepy stare. "But that's all up to you."

"I said I'd get you the money," Matt replied, the rage starting to seep into his voice. "One way or another."

Benson laughed. "It's not your money I want," he said caressing Matt's cheek. "No, I want something more." He leaned forward and whispered into Matt's ear. "I meant it when I said you could do so much better than him."

Matt's eyes narrowed and he pushed Benson off of him. "Never!" he hissed.

"Fine," Benson said throwing his arms up in the air. "I'll just leak the information to Kira's followers." Matt audibly growled at this. Benson turned around and clamped his fingers over his chin. "Then again, I think I might like to see him die slowly of infection."

"You're evil," Matt cried.

"Maybe," Benson laughed. "But you knew the payment here was heavy." He placed a hand on Matt's shoulder and said, "If you like you can take him elsewhere."

Matt looked away, momentarily stunned speechless. That was not an option as it was too obvious that the police were checking hospital records for anyone matching Mello's description who checked in within the past hour. The fact that he suffered burn wounds would just be announcing themselves to the world.

"Fine," Matt relented. He had to keep himself from tearing up. He could only hope that Mello could understand and forgive him. The tears dried before falling and stern eyes met with Benson's smirking ones. He pointed his slightly trembling index finger at the doctor and barked, "But you better fix him good."

"Yes, I will," Benson said reaching for the hem of Matt's shirt. He began to tug it up when Matt smacked his hands away.

"You save him first THEN you can have your payment," Matt snapped. "And he better be back to one-hundred percent when you're done."

Benson chuckled. "You drive a hard bargain, but agreed." He held up a finger to Matt's face. "But if you try and go back on your word, I'll inject him with a deadly substance. Understood?"

Matt nodded. As Benson turned to begin his work on Mello, Matt stepped outside and sunk to the ground. The tears that he fought back for the duration of his bartering with Benson slipped past his defenses. They collected at the bottom of his goggles. All those years of holding back the display of pain had finally reached the breaking point. His hands trembled and he prayed that Mello would forgive him for what he had to do.

Benson kept true to his word and within three hours time Mello was spared from all infections and the burns cared for. He would require dressings and medication for the pain for a while, but in all he would survive. His appearance, however, was not as lucky. The skin had already begun to scar, and unless Mello was willing to undergo plastic surgery it would stay that way. Matt knew that Mello would be opposed to wasting more time on cosmetic surgery, and it would be harder to keep his form of payment from Mello with him in a more coherent state.

While Mello recovered in a world of morphine, Matt kept his end of the bargain. He felt so dirty and that surgeon treated him like an insignificant whore, but he knew that Benson would fulfill his threat if he backed out. The whole time Matt internally apologized to Mello, hoping that Mello would never inquire how he retrieved the funds for the operation.

As they were about to leave Benson stepped forward planted a kiss on the top of Matt's head. He said in that stomach-churning voice, "If you ever realize that you deserve better, you can come back to me, precious."

Matt jerked away from Benson's hold with Mello securely draped over his shoulder. The medicine would keep him unconscious for a while. The nurse even provided him with a month's worth of painkillers before their departure. Matt knew the blond would be reluctant to take them, but he would have to convince him to do otherwise, or force feed him.

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><p>The instant Matt got Mello home he put him to bed. Mello slept soundly despite the fact he nearly met his death that night. Matt cuddled close to Mello and kissed him on the uninjured cheek. Mello was an independent individual, but he would need to rely solely on Matt for the next few weeks.<p>

After making sure Mello would not need him anytime soon, Matt hurried to the bathroom. He took a long shower, leaning against the soiled wall as the water vainly attempted to wash away the redhead's shame. He wept bitterly fearing what Mello would do if he ever found out. He could only hope that Mello would understand that he did it out of love. Matt's stomach churned and he opened his mouth to dispose of half digested contents that had threatened to spill for the past few hours. With his head and throat now stinging Matt turned off the faucet. Beads of lukewarm water dripped down his putrid body. He only wanted to go to sleep and wake up with Mello lying next to him with the evening's events being a mere figment of his unconscious.

Quickly dressing, Matt made his way back to the bedroom that sheltered his love. He sat in a desk chair by the bed, his eyes refusing to part from Mello's fragile body. Matt's heart broke to watch one who was always so strong moaning with every other breath. However, it was that labored rise and fall of Mello's bandaged chest that kept his tears at bay. Ever since Mello's premature departure from the orphanage those many years ago Matt promised himself he would not shed another tear until the whole Kira mess had ended and he could finally make things right with the only person, besides from L, he ever loved. He had already broken that promise once over the course of the evening. All he could do now was shield his tears from Mello when he chose to open his eyes.

Matt watched Mello restlessly sleep until his body could take it no longer. His eyes finally slumped and he fell into a lump on the carpeted floor next to Mello's bed.

Matt woke several hours later to see Mello in a sitting position with his hands folded in his lap. The redhead scrambled to his feet, wincing at the sharp pain in his back. He stretched out the kinks and stood to face the icy left eye belonging to his lover.

"Matt," Mello said weakly.

"Hey, I'm here," Matt said kneeling next to the bed. He gently touched Mello's fingers. Mello squeezed his index and middle finger around Matt's.

"Matt," Mello said in a grave tone. With a hitched breath he turned to Matt with a wide eye. His hand reached up to grasp at the bandage covering his right eye. "Why can't I see out of this eye?" he shrieked.

Matt gasped. The look in Mello's functional eye reminded him of the horror movies they used to sneak into the orphanage. Mello's lips quivered as he repeated his question in a more screeching tone.

"It's—it's just the bandages, I swear," Matt replied. He grasped at Mello's hand and pulled it away from the white cloth. "Don't touch it, your skin has to heal."

"It hurts," Mello said with a heavy gasp. The flesh stung and he jerked away from Matt in a futile attempt to alleviate the pain. Mello gasped for breath again as another wave of pain rushed through his nerves. Mello clenched his fists and leaned tightly against the pillow.

Matt reached for the item on the nightstand. He pulled at the medicine bottle, cursing the childproof lid. Finally the top popped off and two pills fell into Matt's palm. He grabbed the half-empty bottled water lying on the floor and touched Mello's uninjured cheek.

"Mels, please," Matt begged. The familiar voice slightly calmed the blond. "Take your medicine and you'll feel better."

Mello was in too much pain to argue. He swallowed the pills and leaned his head against the pillow once more, waiting for the medication to take effect. Matt soothed Mello's hair, the action helping the other man to regulate his breathing.

Not much time passed before the medicine alleviated the pain. Matt took that as the sign to escape to the kitchen while Mello slept. An hour later he returned with a light broth, something that would be easy for Mello to swallow. Mello glared but allowed Matt to feed him.

Benson suggested that Mello stay in bed for at least a week to give the skin a chance to heal. It was inevitable that the flesh would scar and Matt feared Mello's reaction when he finally saw the permanent distortion to his face. For the time being he was relieved to have his love still alive by his side.

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><p>The next two weeks followed a simple routine. Matt would feed and care for Mello, tending to the burns and forcing him to take his medication. At first the pain was so unbearable that there was not much of a resistance. After a few days Mello was ready to head back into the field of catching Kira. It was time for Matt to put his foot down and keep the blond in bed. Mello sulked when he realized he was in no condition to argue with his caregiver. He pouted, all while promising himself that when he regained his strength he would return to his work. Matt agreed if Mello was no longer in danger of reinjuring himself.<p>

By the third week Mello was able to get out of bed and for the most part take care of himself. Matt was still there to make sure he took his medicine. Now that he could freely walk he was not as willing to down the pills, but Matt was not one to easily surrender. They compromised that Matt would allow Mello to do more on his own if he would at least take his medicine without resistance.

Matt stood outside the bathroom the day Mello finally glanced upon his reflection. At first he was stunned to silence to see that disfigurement staring back at him. Mello's rough fingertips caressed the tarnished skin. He always prided himself on his looks and to see them stolen from him and replaced with something so unfamiliar hit him hard.

The blond looked up to see Matt's reflection staring at him. Without making eye contact with the real person Mello asked, "Is it really that bad?"

Matt shook his head. He stepped closer and wrapped his arms around Mello's torso. He leaned his head against the scarred shoulder and whispered, "In all honesty, I think it makes you look sexier."

Mello scoffed at what he thought to be an obvious lie. Matt knew Mello too well for his own good and kissed the burn. Matt turned Mello to face him and for the first time since the night of the explosion their lips met. Mello closed his eyes and pulled his boyfriend closer, grasping at every inch of Matt's beautiful body. He had been denied too long and now that the burns no longer pained him he wanted Matt to worship the scars that he claimed were appealing. Matt was too willing to comply as his lips caressed the wounds that he truly found enhanced Mello's appearance. He was too glad to have Mello alive, not caring if his entire body had been affected. He had feared that he would never have the chance to hold him again, but that fear vanished the second Mello woke up the day following the accident.

Matt helped the stronger male to remove his vest. Those chiseled abs that his memory never forgot were on display for him to stroke. Mello moaned at the feel of his boyfriend's hands gracing his body. He had forgotten how much he enjoyed Matt's touch. Their lips met once more, their tongues too eager to taste the other. Matt's left thumb stroked the burn, memorizing the new feature. After being denied each other for too long the hormones took over and the two made passionate love the rest of the afternoon.

In that moment of euphoria Matt's only desire was to have Mello there with him for the remainder of their existence. He closed his eyes while resting his temple against Mello's chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. The blond had already drifted into slumber and it would not be long until he joined him.

That was when the thought hit the redhead. He turned to take in the image of his lover in his most innocent of states. His lips curved downwards with the realization of just how close he was to losing the only person who mattered to him.

Wanting to lash out at anyone Matt blamed an array of people: Kira, those memories left of the members of the mafia who were supposed to protect Mello, Near, and even L. Like all the Whammy children, Matt had adored L. Now that the obsession of wanting to impress and avenge the late detective nearly stole his Mello from him, Matt found a reason to resent the super genius.

Matt finally realized that Mello had no intentions of quitting his search for Kira. He even briefly mentioned it that morning at breakfast which Matt pushed aside as nothing. Matt squeezed his arms tighter around Mello. His heart ached with the realization that Mello learned nothing from his past mistake and was more than willing to put himself in danger again for the sake of finding Kira. It frightened the slightly older male.

The image of Mello meeting his demise in the next fire became too real and he began to whimper. His eyes landed on Mello's scarred face once more. Next time it could be much worse. Shaking Matt sat up, all hope of falling sleep vanished. When Mello woke he would have to speak with him and he could only hope that Mello was willing to listen.

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><p>The next chapter should be up shortly. Thank you for reading. Have a great day, everyone.<p> 


	2. First Argument

I do not own Death Note.

Warnings: There is some strong language (Mello is in this story :P), implied violence, and spoilers for both seasons.

A/N: I'm taking a few liberties with the timeline, but it follows the same chronological order as the canon events.

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><p>The ticking of the ventilation system eventually lulled Matt to sleep. He stirred two hours later to find himself laying alone in a mess of sheets. The redhead jumped up and glanced around for any sign of his bedmate. It was the scent of chicken and garlic that caused Matt to toss back the blankets and dawdle towards the kitchen.<p>

The blond busied himself at the stove. Unknown to many, Mello was in fact a decent cook. Matt strode over to his lover and wrapped his arms around Mello, causing the latter to drop the spoon.

Mello glanced back at Matt and gave him that rare, sincere smile. "You woke up in time," Mello said in an even rarer gentle voice. He turned and kissed his boyfriend atop his head. "Dinner's almost ready."

"You didn't have to go to all that trouble," Matt said embracing the man dressed in black. He nuzzled into the side of Mello's scarred neck, inhaling that leather scent that radiated off of his clothes.

"You took care of me the past two weeks," Mello replied, returning his attention to the stove. He stirred the garlic rice twice more before turning off the appliance. "Let me return the favor."

Matt took his place at the already set table. It was not often that Mello showed such affection. The plate was set before him causing Matt to suddenly regret what he wanted to discuss with his lover. Mello sat across from him, picking up his fork, and prodding the food.

Matt pushed the rice about his plate, staring down at the food. Usually he would have scarved it down, but there was too much on his mind. Mello was in one of his rare good moods which left the older boy in a dilemma. The last thing he wanted was to ruin that mood, but then again it was the best time to discuss matters.

"Something wrong?" Mello asked, the glass of chocolate milk in hand. Matt glanced up to see Mello scrutinizing him.

Matt shook his head and shoved a large forkful into his mouth. He made noises that that complimented his boyfriend's cooking. Mello nearly smiled then resumed eating.

There was little conversation before Mello decided to drop the bomb.

"After dinner I have some business to attend to," he said, not bothering to make eye contact with the other. A few seconds of silence cued Mello to reveal his plan. He slightly leaned forward then added, "I have a few errands to run." Matt intentionally chose to ignore Mello. The former mafia boss frowned and his tone darkened as he revealed, "It's time to show them I'm not dead."

"Near?" Matt asked, not looking up at Mello. From his peripheral vision Matt saw Mello slightly nod. "He probably already knows," Matt said absently.

Mello clenched his teeth and fist at the other male's statement. However in the back of his mind he was aware that Near was too quick to simply accept the death of the second smartest Whammy boy without any concrete proof.

"Are you finally going to accept his request to work alongside him?" Matt asked, hoping that Mello had learned something after the last ordeal.

Mello answered his question with a scowl. "I just want that damn photograph back," he said with hatred in his voice. "I know he gave that information to the police."

"Then what?" Matt asked, not wanting to hear the answer.

"Then back to where we left off," the blond answered, gripping his glass.

"You mean before the accident?" Matt asked, gritting his teeth. The both of them were well aware that it was not an accident and was in fact Mello's own doing. It was a foolish action that almost cost Mello his life and he was more than ready to jump back into that dangerous line of work. His life was not a factor as long as he is the one to take Kira down. He was going to sacrifice it all to please a dead idol.

"Yes," Mello answered. "It was too close last time. I have to make sure I'm one step ahead of Kira."

Matt cringed at the mention of that murderer's name. It had been way too close last time.

"I'll take him down next time," Mello stated. "Even if it means taking out the both of us. I'll make sure he won't escape again."

With an irritated sigh Matt tossed his fork against his plate.

"What the Hell's wrong with you?" Mello yelled.

"You know, it...it doesn't matter," Matt said throwing his arms up. He collected his dishes and threw them into the sink, receiving some relief at the sound of plaster clanging against metal. He leaned against the counter, listening for the sound of Mello approaching him. Matt turned around to stare Mello in the eyes.

"Why you so pissy all of a sudden?" Mello snarled.

"When is it going to be enough?" Matt asked shortly.

"What the hell're you bitchin' about?" Mello shouted back.

Matt's glare intensified. The image of that night he discovered Mello ablaze resurfaced. He recalled all the tears that he shed for Mello's sleeping form, hoping and praying that he would make it out of surgery alive. The memories of Mello writhing in pain the day after the accident was an image his mind would never be relieved of.

Without knowing a tear slipped through his defenses. He sniffled hoping to suck that salt droplet back into his tear duct.

"Matt, you're crying," Mello said wiping away the streaming tear.

Matt clutched Mello's index and middle finger in his grasp. His body shook with a sob as he pulled Mello close to him. Matt's arms wrapped around Mello's toned form. He leaned his chin against Mello's shoulder. Mello stood speechless in utter confusion at the other man's behavior.

"Mello, please, don't do this anymore," Matt begged behind a sob. Mello opened his mouth, whether to question or protest, Matt was unsure, but he was not going to allow either to happen. "Please, either just let Near deal with it, or collaborate with him. Without the mafia, you don't have the same resources as him, he has the best chance of catching Kira."

Mello pushed Matt from him. "You want me to give up on the investigation?" he hissed. The glare burned into Matt. "After all I've done, after all I've been through you want me to just throw it all away?"

"All _we've_ been through," Matt growled back.

"Don't you start that!" Mello yelled.

"It's always about you!" Matt retorted. "Why can't you just put your damn pride aside for a minute and think about me for once?"

"What does any of this have to do with you?"

Matt's eyes narrowed. He clenched his fists and held them tight to his sides so as not to grab Mello about the neck and strangle him.

"No, it's not about me," Matt said as another tear fell. "It's always you. It's always been about you. I'm just your little lackey, aren't I?"

"Matt," Mello interrupted.

"Shut up and listen to me!" Matt screamed. "For once you are going to stand there and hear me out."

"I don't have to put up with this shit!" Mello yelled, pushing his way past Matt and stomping towards the door. The leather-clad boy grabbed the keys resting on the side table then threw open the door.

With his back to Mello, Matt stood there and winced at the sound of the door slamming shut behind him. He listened to the sound of those heavy boots colliding with each step until Mello reached the bottom level. The familiar sound of a motorcycle starting up filled the outside air. In no time that vehicle sped off leaving Matt in the apartment all alone with his thoughts.

With a deep breath Matt grabbed the glass Mello had been drinking out of and chucked it against the wall. The cup shattered upon contact while Matt inhaled and exhaled rapidly as the shards tumbled to the ground. Matt sank into the chair with his face in his hands, tears rolling freely.

He hated himself for crying, but with the ever-present images of Mello's burning, unconscious body floating through his mind, there was nothing to keep his tears at bay. He wept bitterly at the thought of next time arriving too late and having to gaze upon Mello in a casket.

If only he could distance himself from the stubborn fool. If only he could make himself stop loving him.

* * *

><p>Matt rested his head against the pillow, his eyes wide open. He found himself believing in a deity more often ever since Mello's accident. Despite the anger burning in his heart, there was no way his body would allow him to rest until Mello returned home.<p>

After hours of waiting, eventually deciding to clean the broken glass from the kitchen floor, the front door slowly opened. Matt tightened his hold around himself. The sounds of the other human stomped around the kitchen before stepping into the bathroom. Matt shut his eyes to push back the tears. A few minutes later the bed sank as another weight was piled on top.

Two strong arms wrapped themselves around Matt's torso and pulled him close. Matt sighed, not having to glance back, for he had memorized those arms.

"I'm sorry," that familiar voice whispered. "I'm so sorry, Matt." Mello's hold tightened. Eventually Matt turned to face his boyfriend.

His face appeared sincere, but Matt was too used to apologies. Ever since they were kids, anytime Mello did anything that provoked Matt to anger, the blond came running back, bearing his heart and soul, confessing how sorry he was for his actions. At times Matt wondered if the apologies were only routine. Nonetheless, he fooled himself into accepting them each time. He would accept then things would be fine until the next fight where the cycle would repeat.

Too tired to bother any further, Matt snuggled close to Mello.

"You're forgiven," Matt whispered in a barely audible voice.

Those were the only words Mello needed to hear. He planted a kiss on Matt's forehead then embraced him once more. The two remained in each other's hold for the remainder of the night.

* * *

><p>The next morning Matt was the first to wake. While Mello slept it was hard to believe he had such a harsh personality. He appeared so gentle with his eyes and mouth shut.<p>

Matt sat on the edge of his bed thinking over their fight the previous night. He told Mello that he forgave him, but he knew that it was only to appease the moment. He wanted to discuss his feelings in a more civil manner, but decided to wait until after breakfast.

A few minutes later Mello rose and smiled at his lover. Matt ran his fingers through Mello's silky tresses. Mello moaned in pleasure at the touch. Matt wanted to crawl back into bed and spend the rest of the morning cuddling, but knew that Mello's touch had the magical ability to cause him to forget the reason for their quarrel.

Over breakfast Mello told Matt (after apologizing twice more for his behavior at dinner) of all that occurred the previous night. He told of how he kidnapped Halle from her hotel room in order to use her as a hostage to gain safe entrance into Near's headquarters. He neglected to mention that Near was not surprised by Mello's methods, nor the fact that he was still alive. It irked Mello to some extent that Near was always one step ahead of him that even faking his own death had no affect on the other genius. Near ordered his men not to harm Mello and allowed him to approach and freely speak. Near agreed to return the photograph and because of some misplaced sense of righteousness, Mello felt the need to offer up information regarding the shinigami and the notebook. While some scoffed at Mello's words, Near had every reason to believe him.

Mello ended his story with the news that he still had no intentions of working with Near. Matt held his tongue throughout, somewhat berating himself for not being there with Mello during the meeting. He would have liked the chance to see Near again, though he had a strong feeling that Mello would have refused to let Matt enter the building for his own safety. Matt only wished that Mello was willing have the same regards for his own life.

That was all that Mello said on the matters. He somewhat feared that Matt would start screaming again. A part of him wanted to know what it was that sent his beloved over the edge that night, but the majority of him wanted to avoid another argument. He needed energy and a clear mind to continue with the investigation.

When the meal was finished Mello excused himself to resume his work without so much as waiting for a response from the other man. Matt sighed and leaned his forehead against his hand. There was no time for fretting yet since Mello had yet to come up with another scheme to put himself at risk. However, Matt had a feeling in the pit of his stomach that it was only a matter of time before his love threw himself into the fire again, literally, for the sake of catching Kira. He would sacrifice himself, everything that Matt loved, to prove himself to both Near and L.

* * *

><p>Thus ends chapter two. This was supposed to be a two-shot, but now it's going to be a three-shot. There will be a lot more angst and drama in the next chapter.<p>

I hope you all enjoyed. Have a great day.


	3. Unexpected Acquaintance

I do not own Death Note.

Thank you xElementFivex and DreamRain-Letters for your reviews on the last chapter.

DreamRain-Letters, I took your suggestion and added it to this chapter.

Author's Note: I had intended for this to be the last chapter, but it now seems as though this will be a four chapter story.

Warnings: Violence, blood, angst, minor swearing, shonen ai, and a rather steamy kissing scene.

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><p>The following two days occurred with little incident. For the most part Mello kept himself occupied with scrutinizing every detail within the documents that Matt hacked from the police's computer. He offered to help, but eventually ceased because Mello ended up double checking the contents of the papers Matt had finished.<p>

Both nights the blond retired three hours after Matt announced his heading to bed. Both nights Matt stirred when his lover climbed in bed with him. He pretended to be sound asleep to avoid any possible arguments. The amount of new information swirling through Mello's brain in addition to being nowhere closer to discovering Kira's identity was bound to make him snappy. They made a rule that they would never go to bed angry. For the sake of honoring that rule, Matt kept his eyes shut until he heard the first soft snore.

Each night Mello wrapped his arms around Matt's torso, breathing in the scent of cinnamon and tobacco that engulfed the older man's hair. Matt always shuddered at Mello's touch. He always found himself involuntarily sinking into his hold. That touch was now accompanied by the throbbing reminder that he almost lost his beloved in that explosion. The fact that his actions could still end his life plagued Matt's thoughts each time Mello's fingers stroked him. With every kiss came the dreaded worry that it may be their last. So many nightmares began that night, each one ending with Mello dying in his arms. With a bleeding heart Matt shut his eyes and allowed Mello's steady breathing to lull him to sleep.

* * *

><p>The following afternoon Matt sat on the couch, his fingers fiercely attacking the buttons on his game console. The Gameboy sang out sound effects over its soundtrack. Were the gamer not too wrapped up in his activity he would have heard the door slamming and the keys clanking as they hit the side table that sat next to the door.<p>

Leather swished as the other inhabitant of the apartment joined his lover in the living room. His icy blue eyes held their usual displeased gaze. He took a deep breath then called Matt's name twice. He inhaled sharply then grasped the game from the redhead's hands. Matt's mouth opened in protest, but slowly shut his lips when Mello tossed the game across the room.

Matt leapt up ready to confront his boyfriend and whatever complaints and rants he readied this time. However, he stopped upon seeing the fierce, yet calm glare in Mello's eyes. That stare sent chills down his spine. The older male was used to Mello's temper and constant yelling, but he froze upon seeing Mello standing there in silence, that fierce glower displaying his emotions. A silent Mello meant the prologue to destruction.

"Please sit down, Matt," Mello said while not tearing his gaze from the mentioned.

Matt swallowed collected saliva that pooled in his mouth. Slightly shivering he found the leather cushion and sat down, not daring to look away. The last time Mello spoke to him in that calm manner with that amount of restraint in his body it was when he broke the news that he was leaving the orphanage.

"Mello," Matt said, nearly stuttering over his words.

Mello held up a hand and remained standing. Matt began to sweat at the new disadvantage.

The two stared at each other in silence for several minutes. To the redhead it felt much longer. Finally Mello broke his gaze and lowered himself to the couch. He crossed one leg over the other then returned his attention to Matt.

"Matt," Mello said. He paused again to collect the recently acquired information.

Matt trembled as he waited for Mello to reveal the bad news. He only hoped that he was not planning another life-threatening mission. Matt considered tying Mello to the chair and padlocking the doors then storming outside to remove the engine from Mello's motorcycle for extra measure in order to keep him safe.

Mello's hands twitched and Matt hated that for once he was unable to read Mello's emotions. He preferred facing a raging fury rather than the unreadable creature before him. It was too out of character for the man he loved.

"I went to check the mafia's finances today," Mello finally confessed. "To see where we stand with our resources." Matt exhaled slowly, yet chose to remain silent for he could tell the storm had not yet passed. Mello's eyes met with Matt's. "For the most part the funds are the same as they were the night of the accident."

Matt blinked as his brain processed what Mello just told him.

"Then what's the problem?" Matt asked. He scoffed then with an angry frown added, "Don't scare me like that!" He clenched his fists by his side to keep from slapping his boyfriend's arm.

"Matt," Mello said in that serious voice that ceased the other man's words. One look into those frigid eyes and Matt could sense that the news gave Mello no reason to celebrate. "Matt…" Mello trailed off as he tried to make sense of the various thoughts running through his brain. "You've been able to pay the rent and buy food these past two weeks, so I know your account is stable."

Matt nodded and waited for Mello to make his point. Even though everything sounded good so far, that look on Mello's face made his chest sting.

"You better tell me now and don't you lie to me!" Mello growled, his voice gaining force and raising a half octave. The sudden change caused Matt to slightly sink into the couch. "I'm not an idiot and I know the range that bastard Benson charges. How the hell did you pay him?"

Matt's face paled. He knew it was only a matter of time before Mello confronted him about the payment, but he hoped it could have waited just a bit longer.

"Mello," Matt said, his voice wavering. Mello's eyes narrowed at the weak tone in which his name was spoken. "Please, just let it go. I paid him and that's all that matters." He moved to leave.

Mello jumped up and grasped Matt's wrist. "Matt, I'm not in the mood for games. You better tell me now!" He twisted without realizing.

"Mello! You're hurting me!" Matt shouted, trying to pull away from the lock Mello had on his wrist.

Mello immediately released his hold. Matt winced as his other hand massaged the sting out of his injured wrist.

Mello grabbed Matt by the chin and without applying too much strength, forced him to look up. He could clearly see the hurt and regret in Matt's eyes.

"Did he touch you?" Mello asked, recalling the time he stepped out of the examination room to see the hungry look in the doctor's eyes as he looked upon Matt. It took all of his self-control to restrain himself from shooting Benson on the spot.

Matt answered by averting his gaze.

"How far did he go?"

Matt bit his lip and stared down at the floor. He cringed at the sound of Mello releasing angry air from his nostrils.

"Did he hurt you?" Mello asked, pure hatred saturating his words.

Without making eye contact Matt answered, "I'm sorry, Mello. I'm so sorry…" he managed to meet the gaze of the blond. A mix of anger and pain was displayed on his face. Choking back a sob he said, "But it was the only way he would save you." He wiped away a falling tear. "He was going to let you die if I didn't. Please don't hate me."

The countable seconds that Mello stood silent it seemed as though all sound had vanished from the room.

"I'm so sorry," Matt sobbed.

Mello snarled and headed towards the door. He reached inside the table where he hid his spare revolver. The ex-mafia leader checked to make sure it was loaded before stuffing it in his pants then stormed out the door with the motorcycle keys in hand.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Matt cried as he followed after.

Mello dashed down the stairs heading towards his vehicle of choice. Matt caught up to Mello, short of breath, and he grabbed his arm. Matt pulled with all his strength only for Mello to easily break from his grip.

"Don't do this," Matt begged.

"He'll never lay another damn hand on you again!" Mello snarled before shoving the keys into the ignition. Before Matt could respond Mello sped off in the direction of the hospital.

* * *

><p>Matt paced the floors of the kitchen, his heart pounding every second since Mello's hasty leaving. He gnawed at his knuckles leaving them chapped and red. Twice his teeth nearly broke the skin. Matt had smoked three-fourths a pack of cigarettes in the two hour period.<p>

Another hour passed and Matt found himself sitting at the kitchen table drumming his fingers on the surface. He started on a second pack of cigarettes. Matt flicked the lighter and watched as the end of the stick turned to ash. He inhaled the tobacco, letting it relax his nerves. The thin stream of white released from his lips, carrying tension with it. He knew how Mello felt about him smoking, but at the moment he would welcome Mello's nagging and lecturing about cancer and other related illnesses. Matt acknowledged long ago that the stress that came with being Mello's significant other would murder him long before cancer had the chance.

Matt could only handle the solitude with his thoughts for twenty minutes more. He snuffed out the fourth cigarette butt then grabbed his keys before stepping out of the apartment.

Matt allowed his feet to carry him for two miles before he looked around to see where he was. The city was still foreign to him. He hoped that this case would end and Mello return to his senses. However he knew in the pit of his heart that Mello would never stop until the man who killed his idol had finally met his end. If given the choice Mello would even be willing to drag Kira to the grave with him.

The stressed man leaned against a brick wall and just watched the people pass by. He wondered how they could just go about their normal lives with a madman out there killing off their fellow species left and right. In order to protect their lives, his boyfriend was putting his on the line. Mello would fight to death if just to receive a pat on the back and verbal praise from L in the afterlife. That fact pulled at Matt's heart each time he watched Mello's back exit their front door.

The thought that haunted his brain struck once more. He was second and always would be second in Mello's eyes. Even when they were children at Whammy's, Matt devoted himself to Mello and in return he was always pushed aside for Mello's dreams. Mello strived and pushed himself to near exhaustion in hopes to attain some dream that would never come to pass. From the instant Near arrived at the orphanage it was already accepted by most that he was the one who would ultimately succeed L were anything to ever happen to him. However L wanted a backup plan for the split chance that Near's mortality would prevent him from taking up his mantle. That allowed for Mello to exhaust every bit of energy and sacrifice all merriment of his childhood in a futile attempt to surpass the younger child, when he was destined to always place second. Whether out of retaliation, or due to Mello's own unintentional selfishness, Matt was also pushed to an inferior priority.

The news of L's demise hit, crushing Mello. At that point L had yet to make his decision in hopes that the two top students would work together to take down Kira. Mello decided that he would rather meet a most agonizing end then have to take that stab to his pride that at best he could only be on par with Near. To save what was left of his pride and mourn the death of his idol he gave up on being the next direct L. Despite Matt's pleas, Mello left. Years passed without contact until Mello finally showed up in Matt's life again with a job for him. Matt took it without hesitation merely to rekindle what he had lost with his only friend.

Now he looked back on his memories and wondered if his decision to reunite with Mello was worth the dangers and stress on his heart. As for Mello nothing changed, once again Matt was only second to the investigation.

Matt lit up another cigarette then leaned his head against the cool bricks. He exhaled the smoke lazily through pursed lips and ran a hand through his red locks.

"Do you have another," a voice said from his left.

Matt glanced up and reached into his pocket to share one of his treasures with the lady who held out her hand. Matt smiled as he watched her place the tobacco stick in between her luscious lips. She was a beautiful, slim woman with blonde, straight hair, cut in layers falling over her shoulders, not a strand out of place. Her eyes were hidden by designer shades. Matt flicked the lighter as she leaned in to allow the tip to be engulfed in the flame.

"Thank you," she said strategically placing her fingers about the cigarette. In the second their hands touched she slipped a folded sheet of paper into Matt's palm. He instinctively clasped his hand about it, making it appear to any possible observer that he was only grasping the lighter.

Heat collected in Matt's face as he tried to control his breathing.

"Have him call my cell," the woman spoke in a barely audible voice while exhaling. "Near has a plan."

Matt's eyes widened behind the goggles. When he regained control of his voice, he asked in a whisper, "How did you—"

He was cut off by a soft chuckle. "I've been watching you, Matt," she answered, leaning against the wall so that it seemed they were sharing small talk.

Matt's heart raced. Sweat formed beneath his neck with the knowledge that if Near wanted to take him out, he could order it at any second. He would be justified for offing an accomplice of a dangerous man who had kidnapped one of Near's, the very woman standing next to him. Matt found himself wishing that Mello had not spared her. Judging by her physique, she could easily take him down if she wanted.

Halle noticed the discomfort of the striped-clad boy beside her. She exhaled smoke rings in a graceful, manner. She stated, "Don't worry, Near didn't give me any more information than that name." She paused then added, "If it helps aid your trust, I haven't told him where the two of you are hiding."

That news both calmed and scared him. He found himself wishing that Mello had not the tendency to make enemies of everyone who came his way.

Halle finished her smoke and crunched the butt beneath her shoe.

"I'll be waiting his call," she said before turning away.

Matt nodded. Having completed her mission she thanked him for the cigarette once more before taking her leave. Matt watched her disappear down the sidewalk before starting back towards the apartment. The last thing he needed was for his trigger-happy boyfriend to arrive home to find him missing.

* * *

><p>Matt returned to their home to find it void of any screaming gunslingers. He inhaled deeply then let the air slowly release from his lungs. He unclenched his hand to find that white slip of paper somewhat damp from sweat. He tossed it on the table then sank down into the couch.<p>

Barely twenty minutes passed before the front door swung open. From the way it slammed it was not required for Matt to glance over. He listened as the keys were slung on the side table and heavy boots pounded across the floor.

Mello made his way to the couch and hovered over the other male. He wore his usual scowl. Seeing the startled look upon Matt's face, the blond's expression softened, the frown staying in place.

"Mello," Matt said in a timid voice.

"That creep will never lay a hand on you again," Mello stated. "I made sure of it."

For the first time Matt noticed a few splatters of red along Mello's neck and chest. Mello had stripped of the bloodstained coat and cast it into the fire to delete all evidence of his involvement in Benson's death. Mello threw the gun on the coffee table.

Before Matt could speak Mello placed his hands under Matt's face and brought their lips together. Matt closed his eyes and breathed in Mello's unmistakable scent. Their tongues rolled over one another for a few minutes. In a moment of passion Mello straddled Matt and pushed his back against the arm of the leather couch. The pain went unnoticed as Matt's hands found themselves digging through Mello's shiny locks. Mello's hands caressed Matt's back then pushed him closer as he deepened the kiss.

Matt parted from his lover's mouth. Panting he asked, "Where did that come from?"

"I'm sorry," Mello said then gently ran a stream of kisses down Matt's neck. He looked up then said, "I should've protected you from that bastard." He stopped kissing and wrapped his arms protectively around Matt. "I swear I'll never let anyone hurt you again. I promise." He leaned his ear against Matt's chest to hear the speeding heartbeat. "I promise," Mello said in a softer voice.

Matt tightened his hold on Mello and held him close to his body. He basked in the soothing sound that was Mello's breathing. He felt warm droplets land on his shirt and noticed Mello shaking in his arms. Matt ran his hand through Mello's bangs.

"I'm sorry," Mello repeated. He sniffled then hoarsely said, "Forgive me."

"It wasn't your fault," Matt said as he continued to cuddle and soothe his lover. "There was nothing you could've done in your state."

Mello glanced up at Matt with pain displayed in those icy blues. It was so rare for Mello to allow anyone to see his vulnerabilities. Matt knew and loved him more than any other. Matt would never judge him as weak and it somewhat felt nice to have someone to confide his failures.

Mello allowed his lips to grace Matt's once more. The kiss was not as passionate as before, but it spoke words their voices could never form. Mello nuzzled his head beneath Matt's.

Matt gently stroked Mello as his eyes landed upon the paper containing Halle's number. He shook her from his thoughts. Whatever Near had planned could wait. For once he wanted to fully enjoy being the number one priority in Mello's life.

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><p>Thus ends chapter three. Thank you for reading.<p> 


	4. The Choice

Thank you Brightnight003, DreamRain-Letters, and AnonymouslyStupid for your reviews on the last chapter.

Warnings: Swearing, violence, angst, shonen ai, and a heavy passionate make out session (no smut, PG-13). Also, major spoilers for the second season of Death Note!

Author's Notes:

1) I don't think Matt's age has ever been mentioned, but I always assumed he was slightly older than Mello. For the sake of this story he is a year older

2) Important, please read: This is an alternate ending to the Mello/Matt/Near story. After watching episode 37 again, I got the feeling that Near sort of provided Mello with the opportunity to kidnap Takada (which would end up seriously helping their investigation as a whole). It's just an alternate theory for the purpose of this story. Also, I've only watched the anime, so I'm not sure how much the story differs from in the manga.

3) Three lines of dialogue from the English dub is in here, but has been slightly modified to better fit with the story.

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><p>Matt sat on the couch, the room barely lit, his fingers rapidly stroking the keys of his precious Gameboy. Mello sat beside him, skimming through the details of recent killings that were likely credited to Kira. Through Matt's hacking skills he retrieved information that the police believed that there was in fact a second Kira, however different from the second Kira years ago.<p>

Mello ran a hand over his face. Exhaustion was visible over his features. Having felt like he had aged twenty years in the past two, the ex-mafia leader stretched out his legs as he tossed the heap of papers on the coffee table. He could feel the beginning of a headache. The constant beeps and chimes coming from the game console next to him did little to fight off the acute stabs to his skull. Mello was tempted to grab and toss the Gameboy into the river, but then Matt's cries and yells would only worsen his condition.

Mello kicked the table and watched as the stack of papers was slightly scooted to the right, the individual sheets sprawling in a fan formation. That was when he noticed a slip of paper that he was certain had not been there earlier. However, with the constant piling of documents it was a miracle that anything was ever discovered after being discarded.

The blond snatched up the paper and unfolded it to reveal what appeared to be a telephone number. As far as his memory could recall, he did not acquire such information of late. Mello turned to face his boyfriend whose attention remained on his game.

"Matt!" Mello snapped.

Matt glanced up momentarily to see Mello in his usual angry mood then returned his attention to the game.

"Matt, I'm talking to you!" the blond snapped, reaching for the console.

In order to protect his game Matt lowered it to his lap, skillfully saving the game without looking, and turned it off before facing his enraged lover.

"What is it now?" Matt asked.

"What is this?" Mello barked while waving the slip of paper above his head.

Matt wore a look on his face that was a mix between boredom and confusion as he looked upon the moving white, sheet of paper. The memory dawned on him and his eyes widened behind the goggles. Mello noticed the change in Matt's appearance.

"I completely forgot about that!" Matt yelled as he reached to grab the number.

Mello moved the desired object out of Matt's reach and balled his fist about it.

"It's one of Near's lackey's numbers," Matt replied short of breath. He put a hand to his forehead. "I forgot all about her."

"Her?" Mello asked. "Tall? Blonde hair?"

Matt nodded. "You know her?" he asked, his voice showing that he was not at all surprised. Mello always seemed to know more than he was willing to share until he deemed it necessary.

Mello snatched Matt by the collar of his shirt. "Don't you think this is important?" he yelled.

"I said I forgot—sorry," Matt snapped back.

"How do you forget something this important?" Mello snarled, one hand still holding Matt in place and the other revealing the now crumpled sheet of paper. "The amount of shit you've been forgetting lately makes me want to take you to get your brain examined."

"Look, I said I'm sorry! Damn!" Matt shouted as he pushed Mello's hand from his shirt. He rolled his eyes in an irritated manner then added, "And don't you ever grab me like that again! I'm not one of your damn flunkies from the mob."

Mello stared at his boyfriend wide-eyed. No one had ever dared to speak to him in that manner. At Wammy's, even the adults watched their tone around the easily angered boy. Anyone else Mello would have shot on the spot, but Matt he could never harm.

Mello backed up with a pout. "I'm sorry, Matt," he said.

To anyone else it would have sounded like an argument ender, but to Matt, even through the anger, he could feel the sincerity behind those words. After all he was used to hearing those three words from his boyfriend's mouth. It was a part of the never-ending cycle.

"Alright," Mello said in the calmest voice he could muster. Matt could see Mello was still shaking with rage, but as far as he could tell, the stronger male was doing his best to keep control. "When did you talk to that bitch?" His temper flared up as he asked, "And what the hell was she doing talking to you?"

"After our fight yesterday," Matt replied before Mello's head exploded. "I went for a walk to cool down while you…took care of Benson." Mello cracked his knuckles at the mention of the dead doctor's name. "She found me, we talked, she gave me the number, end of story."

"You talked? What did she say?" Mello asked. For a brief moment Mello displayed a look of fear and perhaps guilt. Had Matt been paying attention he would have caught that switch in expressions. Luckily for Mello, his boyfriend was not the most observant of people.

"She wants you to call," Matt said nodding at the wad of paper in Mello's hand. "Something about useful information about the investigation."

"And you're telling me this now?" Mello asked. He jumped up and punched the wall. The pain in addition to heat tingled through his arm. Feeling somewhat relaxed Mello stretched his fingers to release the remaining sting then took a look at the paper.

Matt's eyes landed on the dent in the wall. He thanked anyone who would listen that Mello always chose to take his anger out on inanimate objects (and occasionally other people) and never once struck him. As far as Matt knew, he was the only person who had ever angered Mello and not had to feel his wrath.

Without another word to Matt, Mello reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. He called the number that was neatly written on the now wrinkled paper. Mello tapped his fingers against the TV stand by the wall as he listened to the generic ringing on the other line.

After the fourth ring the other phone picked up. A female voice said in a stoic tone, "Hello, Lidner speaking."

"Enough with these games, what do you want?" Mello snapped.

There was a hesitant pause on the other line followed by a small gasp. Mello's eyes narrowed and he released a heavy breath through his nostrils.

"Mello," Halle said softly. "It feels good to hear your voice."

Mello's face lit up. He glanced behind him to see Matt once again interested in his videogame. For once he was grateful for his boyfriend's obsessive hobby.

"I was beginning to worry you wouldn't call," she said. "I can't stop thinking about you, you know."

"We can't talk about that right now," Mello said in almost a whisper.

"Oh…" Halle said before trailing off. She smiled, the emotion apparent in her voice. "Your boyfriend is in the room?"

"That's none of your business," Mello replied hotly. "And I don't appreciate you seeking him out. You want to talk to me, you come to me. Got it?"

He heard a soft chuckle then Halle replied, "If that's what you want."

Mello glanced over his shoulder to make sure Matt was not listening. He nonchalantly walked into the adjacent kitchen, checking that Matt had not followed.

"I can't see you anymore," Mello said, his mind taking him back to that moment he broke into Halle's apartment. He had intended for it only to be a mere kidnapping, but fate had other plans for them.

Even with a gun to her head, her desire for affection from her handsome captor took hold of her. Ever since hearing Near's brief warnings and mentioning of Mello, she wanted to meet him, and when their eyes met, hormones took over. The forbidden fruit was too sweet for Mello to decline.

Matt never needed to know of their bedroom activities that night. The guilt alone was enough torment without having to see the pained expression on his love's face. Though he knew it was wrong, his mind tried to rationalize the actions with the recently acquired knowledge that Matt had also engaged in intercourse with another. Each time that thought came to his brain, his heart would scold and slap him for even considering comparing Matt's selfless act of love with the dishonorable one he commited. For both of their sakes Matt could never know.

"Mello," Halle said, sounding almost hurt by Mello's statement.

"It was a mistake I'm not proud of," Mello said harsher than he intended. In a kinder, almost apologetic tone he added, "Just...forget it ever happened."

The cold words stung Halle deeper than she would have expected. In her heart she knew it was only lust that attracted her to Mello and that his love for the hacker was too great for them to ever be anything more than a onetime fling. However rejection of any kind always hurt.

"Very well," she said after that awkward pause. She was unsure how she would react were she ever to see him again, but at least over the phone she was safe from exposed humiliation. "It's probably better this way." Even though they fought for the same goal, their teams would always pose as an obstacle.

"Anyway, what do you want?" Mello asked. "Matt told me you have crucial information."

Mello returned to the living room and watched as Matt continued to click away on that console. Mello took a seat in the chair next to the one Matt occupied. Having released all the tension within, he listened as Halle revealed the information about Mikami, the man Near suspected to be X Kira, in addition to Takada's supposed relation to the two. After hearing and taking into consideration all that Near's agent supplied him with, he concluded everything sounded legit. There was no reason for Near to feed him false information, especially not if he wanted his cooperation.

Halle waited a few seconds, contemplating whether or not she should reveal the next bit, considering that they had little proof. Near wanted the theory tested and he confided in Halle that Mello would be more than willing to sacrifice himself for the good of the case if provided with the right motivation. After relaying that bit of information concerning Mello, Near only hoped that if Mello took the bait, it would not cost him his life.

"Near also suspects the possibility of a fake notebook," Halle said at last. Her swollen heart palpitated at a steady, quickened pace.

Mello held the phone close to his ear. He understood why Halle wanted him to call, why Near wanted him to call. Near would never outright ask him to put his life on the line. Near never hated him; in his ideal world they would all walk out of the investigation unscathed with Kira and all his accomplices in custody, and the notebook removed from their world. However, both Mello and Near were aware that reality rarely worked ideally.

"A fake notebook?" Mello asked.

"Yes," Halle replied. "Givanni has been closely trailing Mikami for the past few weeks and has is almost certain he is the one behind the killings."

"Then why do you think there's a fake?"

"It's just a theory that Near has. Near feels that something is off."

"And he wants it tested?" Mello asked after a beat. He gave the next thought on his mind some serious contemplation before finally asking, "What does he plan to do?"

"He needs to make X Kira panic. If that happens then he might make a mistake, and if it is a fake, then we will finally have him."

Mello processed her words. In that moment he knew what needed to be done. Near would never ask him and he would not put him in the situation to do so.

"It can be resolved by having a name written in the notebook?" Mello asked.

"That's right," Halle responded.

Mello stared down at the floor. His thoughts clashed between what was rational and what needed to be done for the greater good. If he, Mello, did not act then both him and Near would lose their possible only chance of besting Kira.

"I understand," Mello replied. He heard Halle gasp on the other line. Mello quickly added, "I know what I must do, but I'll need your help."

Once he quietly revealed to her the details of his plan she sat there in silence, doing her best to keep composed. It was unnatural for her to feel so strongly towards him.

"Mello," she said. "You don't have to do this."

Mello quickly replied, "Well then, if I don't do it..."

Halle felt a sharp sting in her heart. There was no way to talk him out of it. Near was correct when he mentioned that Mello was the most stubborn of people.

"Very well," Halle said. "I'll call you later with confirmation and details."

"I'll be waiting," Mello replied then hung up.

Mello absently tossed his phone against the vacant couch cushion. Matt looked up from his Gameboy to see Mello hunched over with his hands covering his face, his golden hairs draped over his fingers. Matt turned off his game for the second time in the five minute period.

"Mello," he said, almost afraid to confront him.

Mello looked genuinely worried about something. Anger, frustration, annoyance, sorrow, jealousy, and even occasional gentleness were emotions that usually surrounded Mello, but concern was a new one. Matt was unsure how to handle that one.

"Hey, what did she say?" Matt asked as he knelt down in front of Mello. The blue eyes peered through the hands and Matt stared into what he believed to be a great effort in hiding fear. Matt suddenly felt angry with himself for even keeping that woman's number.

Matt sat down on Mello's lap then wrapped his arms around Mello's shaking body. He gently massaged tiny circles on Mello's back and allowed the blond to lay his head on his shoulder. Matt could not stop the smile forming on his face at the thought that he was the only one in the world who could provide comfort for Mello.

"Mello, please talk to me," Matt said while brushing Mello's long tresses aside. "Even if you have to yell, just talk to me."

Air exited from Mello's nostrils and warmed the crook of Matt's neck. He let his shoulders slump and returned Matt's embrace. The reality hit him that this could be the very last time he ever held Matt. He knew the dangers the minute he laid the plan and was well aware that the chances of him coming out unscathed were impossible, and alive almost as slim. As he mentioned over the phone, somebody had to do it. If Near were every bit as crooked as him, Mello figured he would be laughing right about now, but reality was that the other young genius would rather have it any other way.

"I love you, Matt," Mello said as he pulled the mentioned closer to his body. "I love you so much."

He ran his hands through Matt's hair and yanked those goggles from the other man's face. He stared into Matt's eyes. Matt's eyes were so beautiful and reserved only for Mello to stare into. It baffled him why Matt chose to shield such beautiful orbs, but as with all Wammy kids, Matt had his quirks. Mello kissed the creased skin where the ocular object recently sat. Mello's lips caressed their way all the way down Matt's left cheek, his tongue tasting the flesh every other kiss.

Mello reached Matt's neck and bit down, not enough to hurt, but hard enough to leave a mark. Mello's mouth moved over a half inch and gave that patch of skin the same treatment. Matt moaned in pleasure and became limp in Mello's arms. The blond could not help but smirk, he knew his lover's every turn-on.

Mello placed both hands under Matt's behind and pushed him up so that he was carrying him in a sitting position. Matt's hands clamped together behind Mello's back. Mello carried Matt to the couch and pushed him down on his back. Mello gave Matt a sly smirk before climbing on top of him. He straddled his lover and moved his hands beneath Matt's back. Matt squirmed at the strong arms pulling him up. He hugged Mello's torso then lifted his lips to meet with those belonging to the other man. One hand continued to support Matt's back while the other ran itself through Matt's messy, red tresses. He inhaled Matt's glorious scent.

His tongue ran itself across Matt's lips, awaiting the invitation to enter. Matt decided to tease Mello just a bit and lifted his head so that Mello was licking his chin. Mello playfully glared at his boyfriend. Matt gave him a coy smile. The animal in Mello was released and he forcefully grabbed Matt's face and pressed his lips to the other's. Matt arched his back and Mello kissed the center of his neck with that same amount of power. Matt released a heavy moan, giving Mello the opportunity he needed to infiltrate Matt's mouth. Matt returned the favor, allowing his tongue to wrap about Mello's. The two tongues battled it out, exploring new territory with each blow.

Matt's hands crept about Mello's back. He pushed himself closer to his boyfriend with each motion of the mouth. He never wanted to part from Mello. Without realizing he began lifting Mello's leather vest. Mello helped to wiggle out of the unwanted garment. Matt broke from Mello's mouth and lowered his own to the now bare skin before him. Mello's perfect abs were begging to be kissed and Matt gave them the attention they deserved.

In between moans and heavy pants Mello said, "It's not fair that I'm the only one shirtless here."

"Yes, it's getting hot," Matt said as he removed his own vest.

The next to go was the striped shirt. Mello grabbed the hem of the shirt with his teeth and began to pull it up. Matt removed his arms from the sleeves, immediately clamping themselves around Mello's torso once more.

Mello succeeded in removing the shirt then returned his attention to the topless boy before him. He wanted to taste every inch of the flesh awaiting his touch. Though they had made out and made love countless times before, each time felt like a new experience to Mello.

The two locked eyes. In that moment all of Mello's vulnerabilities that he did a wonderful job of hiding were finally exposed. And the one to look upon those insecurities and imperfections was the only one he could trust them with and the one who did not mind them.

"I love you," Mello said. There were no hidden motives, no masks, nothing but the truth. "I love you more than anything on this earth."

Matt hushed him with his own lips. Mello shut his eyes and gently placed one hand behind Matt's head. The thoughts of the many things that could happen to him entered his mind. Matt was hired to do behind the scenes work and as long as he kept his face behind the computer and his name a secret, Kira could do him no harm. Under no circumstances would Mello allow Matt to walk into the actual battle.

Two more kisses were shared until the phone vibrated beneath Matt's legs. He jumped up into Mello, his head almost busting the blond in the mouth. Mello caught him in time bent over his side to grab the ringing device. The number was Halle's. Mello remembered her mentioning that she would call him right back.

"What does she want now?" Matt asked.

"She has bad timing," Mello muttered as he put the phone to his ear. The two discussed their plans for what was to take place two days later.

Matt pulled his shirt back over his frame as he listened to his boyfriend's side of the conversation. That same nagging twist he felt in his stomach the moment he stared upon a worried Mello suddenly returned. Those same fears of losing Mello surfaced. He particularly did not like that last sentence he spoke before hanging up.

"What's going on?" Matt asked as Mello closed the phone.

"It's nothing," Mello replied. "Just forget it." He reached for Matt's face, hoping they could resume where they left off and the redhead would just forget any exchange between him and Near's agent ever took place. However the look on Matt's face said the opposite.

"Mello, _what is going on_?" Matt asked in stressed syllables. He crossed his arms against his chest. "And why did you say you were going to do something if no one else would."

Mello's eyes narrowed. "You were eavesdropping."

"No," Matt responded shortly. "I overheard." His expression changed to one of pain. "I was hoping you would tell me yourself—voluntarily."

Mello sighed. His body language told the other that he would rather have each tooth forcibly removed rather than reveal what he had planned.

"I'm ready to listen when you're ready to talk," Matt said. He leaned against the arm of the couch, making it known that he was not leaving until he received the information he desired.

There was no use in hiding anything.

Mello took both of Matt's hands in his. "Matt, listen to me," Mello said. His eyes met with Matt's. Matt's heart ached for he already could tell that he would not like where this conversation was heading. "We are running out of time. We may have one shot in catching Kira."

Matt's eyes widened. "Near knows who he is?"

Mello replied, "He is almost certain. He just needs the proof to bring him in." Mello bit his bottom lip then said, "That's where I come in."

"What?" Matt asked, his voice betraying his emotions.

Mello shut his eyes tightly. He inwardly cursed Matt for his curiosity. Upon opening those eyes again he looked his lover in the face and said, "I'm going to call in a favor for someone who owes me his life." Mello slightly shuddered at the fact that Matt was originally scheduled for such a dangerous task, and had Mello asked Matt would have done it. Neverminding that fact, Mello would never put Matt in that kind of danger. "He is going to create some confusion and during that time Lidner is going to deliver Takada into my hands."

"Takada?" Matt asked. "Oh, that bitch from that show." His eyes widened. "Wait, she's a part of this?"

"Near believes her to be the source of communication between the two Kiras," Mello answered.

"Will she confess?" Matt asked.

"Perhaps," Mello replied. "But the main point is for either Kira to make a mistake."

"And then you have him?" Matt asked. Before Mello could answer the realization hit Matt. "Wait? What if Kira discovers what you're up to? What if Kira expects you to…" Matt trailed off and shook his head.

"It's a possibility," Mello answered.

"How possible?" Matt shouted as he stood, pulling his hands from Mello's. "How likely are you to die?" When Mello delayed in answering Matt got in his face and yelled again, "How likely are you to die?"

"Highly!" Mello shouted back. He stood up and added, "It's only fair you know there's very little chance that I will make it out alive."

Matt stared speechless at the younger male. "How…how can you do this? Without consulting me?"

"Matt, listen, this is our only chance…" Mello began, putting his hands upon Matt's shoulders.

Matt shook him loose. "I don't care!" he yelled. "How many more times are you going to do this?" Mello stared at Matt. "How much longer am I going to have to stand here and watch you almost blow yourself to pieces then be there to build you back up only to watch you knock on death's door and do the whole damn thing again?"

"Listen, Matt," Mello said, beginning to lose his calm.

"No, you listen!" Matt screamed, tears welling in his bottom lids. "I'm tired of being left behind with a false assurance that you're going to come back, when I don't know if you'll come back and if you do what condition you'll be in." He sniffed then said, "Last time you lost half your face and you were lucky. What if it's much worse this time? What if you've lost all your luck…what if you…"

At the thought of what fate could befall Mello, Matt could not hold back his tears any longer. He leaned forward and his shoulders shook.

"Matt," Mello said as calmly as he could. Matt glanced up from his hands with a severe glare. Mello replied in all seriousness, "When I paid Near that visit a week ago we made an arrangement…if anything ever happened to me he promised he would ensure that you're taken care of."

Matt released an inhuman shriek. "You think I give two shits about that?" he hissed. "Why do you keep having to put yourself in this kind of danger?"

"I don't have a choice," Mello snapped. "This is our only chance, when will you get it?"

"Will you shut up about that?" Matt hissed. His face had become flushed and he was trying his best to keep new tears from falling. He took a deep breath and with narrowed eyes and a slightly wrinkled nose he hissed, "When is it going to be enough?"

Mello lifted his brow at Matt's recent sentence.

"When?" Matt repeated. He threw his arms in the air and shouted, "Near is L's successor. When are you going to get over it?"

Flames broiled within Mello's heart, displayed in those cold eyes. "You better shut up right now," he said in a dangerous tone, backed with ample venom.

For once Matt was not going to give into Mello's warning.

"No," Matt replied. Mello was caught between shock and fury. Matt continued, "So what? L didn't choose you. Who gives a shit? That was seven years ago! How much longer are you going to let that control you?"

Mello clenched his fists. He wanted nothing more than to silence Matt with those very fists, but he swore that he would never harm him.

Matt was not finished. "By throwing yourself into the fire, literally, are you trying to prove to him that he made a mistake? What good will it do if you're dead?"

An intense heat built up inside Mello's chest. He inhaled sharply, trying his best to release the air slowly, but his lungs were not willing to cooperate.

Matt moved forward and grabbed Mello by his elbows. It took everything within his power not to shake him. "L is dead, Mello. He's gone. Forever." Tears spilt from Matt's eyes. "Nothing you do will bring him back." Matt gritted his teeth then added, "And I won't stand around and watch you throw your life away for that damn corpse any longer!"

"Don't you dare disrespect L!" Mello screamed. Before he knew what he was doing, adrenaline seized his hand and his palm smacked Matt sharply across the face. Mello glared at the redhead, his teeth bared and his eyes appearing as those belonging to a demon. He shakily pointed a finger at Matt. "Don't you ever speak that way about L again!"

Matt stared wide-eyed at Mello, his mouth agape, and his voice suddenly vanished. He placed his hand against the throbbing cheekbone. He winced at the painful touch.

"You—you hit me," Matt said in a choked whisper.

Reality set in and Mello stepped back, staring in horror at his partner. His gaze switched from Matt to his own cursed hand and then back to Matt. Mello shook his head, his breathing hitched.

"No, no, no, I couldn't, I never, no…I didn't," Mello said to himself, his eyes bulging. "Matt," he said shakily. "Matt, please, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." He repeated that phrase several more times, hoping that if he mentioned it enough the past would rewind itself.

Mello fell to his knees, still staring at his own hand that he wanted to sever. He inhaled with a heavy sob and tears soon spilt, his face glistening as he tried to wake himself up from the nightmare he was sure he was living in.

Matt slumped against the wall. For the moment he could not bring himself to look at Mello.

"You know I've always felt bad and kind of embarrassed that I've been so jealous of a dead man," Matt said while staring at their ugly beige carpet. "I thought eventually you would realize how much I love you."

"Please, Matt, I didn't mean to," Mello begged. "I promise I'll never…I didn't mean to." He cupped his hands over his face and screamed into his palms, the very same area that just bruised the one person he loved. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Matt inhaled deeply then glared down at the mess that was Mello. "So often I watched you walk away from me to chase a ghost. "I wanted to support you and I did, because I love you. I just wanted you to return that love."

"I do," Mello gasped. "I do love you. You have to believe me, Matt. I'm—"

"Sorry?" Matt interjected. Mello stared speechless at his boyfriend. "Yes, you're too predictable. How many more times am I going to have to hear your apologies?"

Mello averted his eyes.

Matt was not relenting. "I just wanted to feel that you loved me as much as you claimed to." His tone switched to anger. "But like always I'm still second to L. You said you love me more than anyone or anything, but is that true?"

"Yes, yes, I do," Mello pleaded.

Matt shook his head, "No, you don't," he retorted. "Your love for L is too much for me to bear anymore." Matt scoffed. "I used to think L was great too, but then I saw what he did to you. And now I can't help but hate him. I hate L, I hate him so much. I hate him for what he's done to you and us. I hate him for robbing me of the love I deserve and was promised." With pure hurt plastered on his face Matt looked at Mello and asked, "Is it so wrong to want what is mine?"

Matt moved to where Mello sat and lowered himself to his knees. Mello recoiled into himself, too afraid of what else he might do to the weaker male.

"You listen to me, Mello," Matt said placing a hand on Mello's shoulder. "I want you to understand that I'm the only person in this world who willingly loved you. Everyone else pushed you aside, chose someone else." Matt put his free palm against his chest. "_I_ wanted you. _I_ chose you. I gave up everything for you." He lowered both of his hands to his knees. "Aren't I enough for you?"

"Yes!" Mello cried. He clamped both hands around Matt's and brought them to his mouth. He kissed each of Matt's knuckles.

Matt pulled his hands from Mello's grasp.

"I'm tired of competing with the dead," Matt confessed. "I want you to love me with that same passion."

"I will…I do," Mello replied.

Matt shook his head. "No you don't," he retorted. "If you did then you'd understand why I'm hurting so bad. I'm tired of giving you everything then watching you bottle up your love and laying it before L." The memory of watching Mello leave the orphanage without so much as a goodbye surfaced. He did not want to relive that ever again.

"No, I don't..." Mello found himself at a loss of words, bruised as he had done to Matt's heart countless times.

He placed a hand on Mello's right cheek. "I don't want to lose you to this investigation. I don't want you to become Kira's next prey." He clamped his other hand on Mello's other cheek and stared him directly in the eyes. "I will not stand here and watch Kira kill you because you feel you need to prove L wrong. I won't pick up the pieces. Not anymore."

"What are you saying?"Mello asked.

"I'm saying you have a choice," Matt said bluntly. "Me or the investigation. Which is more important to you? Which do you love more?"

Mello glowered at Matt and jumped up, Matt mirroring his motion. "That's not fair!" he barked. "You can't ask me to give up everything I ever worked for just like that." Mello snapped his fingers to help illustrate his point.

Matt glared in return. "And you can't ask me to watch you kill yourself," he replied.

"How can you be so selfish?" Mello snapped.

"Selfish?" Matt screeched. He laughed and slapping his hand against his own chest. "I'm selfish? I'm selfish?" he cried, his voice raising an octave. "Mello, baby, you look up the word 'selfish' and you will find your pretty little picture for a definition."

"Yes, selfish. Making me choose between my work and the man I love is selfish," Mello snarled. "I know I'm no selfless saint, but that's low."

"You could have chosen to work alongside Near, but of course you listened to your pride. Everything has always been about you. What you want. How you want it. How something isn't fair to you. You, you, you!" Matt inhaled deeply, his face the color of a ripe tomato. "Always you while I was pushed aside!" Matt shouted. "You always put me second. Even now you are putting this investigation before me." Matt firmly placed both hands on Mello's shoulders. "Now! Answer me!" Matt's glare lined directly with Mello's icy eyes. "Which do you choose?"

Mello simply looked away and Matt's body began to shake. He inhaled as deeply as he could and quickly nodded in an attempt to fight off fresh tears.

"You can't decide?" Matt said, trying to keep himself composed. "Very well." He strode over to the table by the door where his car keys waited beside Mello's. He checked his jeans pocket to make sure he had his wallet which housed enough cash to put him up at a hotel for two nights.

"What are you—where are you going?" Mello asked.

Matt turned back to look at his now ex-boyfriend. His eyes displayed both pain and anger. "Since you can't decide, I'm going to decide for you." With those words he threw open the door. "I'm done."

"Matt!" Mello cried, running for him. He grabbed Matt by the arm and pulled with one, while encircling his other around Matt's torso. Matt pushed against Mello's restraints. "Please, Matt, don't leave."

Matt broke from Mello's weakened grip. He descended the staircase, ignoring Mello's pleas for him to return along with other empty promises. Matt suddenly stopped on the ninth step down.

"I'll be back tomorrow for my things," he said without making eye contact. "Try not to break anything that is mine." He continued his walk downwards. As he neared his car one final thought entered his brain. _Perhaps if you can come to your senses and make up your mind, then maybe…maybe._

Mello watched with tearful eyes as Matt stepped into his car. His legs wobbled and he fell to the ground, weeping as Matt drove away in the night. Without Matt there by his side Mello found it difficult to even move. Matt's recent words seeped into Mello's consciousness and now, that it was too late, he realized his mistake.

* * *

><p>The end. I left the ending kind of open-ended, so if you want this to eventually be a happy ending, you can imagine it so.<p>

End Notes:

1) This is an alternate ending in which Matt doesn't die (it's not fair what happened to him).

2) I adore Mello/Matt as a couple, but I also think Mello/Halle is cute, so I included a bit of them in here. I don't think either one truly loved the other, but I think it's easy to assume that Halle did care for Mello by how she reacted upon arriving at the burning church to find him already dead.

Most of all I hope you all enjoyed this story. Thank you for reading and a special thanks to all those who reviewed and favored. I appreciate all your feedback. Have a great day, everyone!


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